Tag Archives: life

He’s given me a new charge
Not many can look into this
For sin is complete and prophecy is fulfilled
A new thing has begun
Even now it springs forth
Blessed are those who wait on the living God
And know his name
It’s complete
A new song is written
A new melody is started
Even now Prophecy is complete
He made me a watchman
Now I must speak
For my watch is come
I must stand at my post
Ready with a tune that beats to his name

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I went searching for the one they call Solomon’s wisdom

I went searching for something, I can now no longer remember

Oh yes, I went searching for the promise 

The promise from of old

The one the watchmen have cleverly hidden

The one the clever ones know to speak nothing of

Like your fool, I went searching for you

Cunning wisdom, some call Sophia

A nameless one named by man

But what I found was afflicted

What I found was madness

What I found was death blossoming into life

An unholy crow sanctified by God alone

They said I was crazy

But life is crazy

To be alive is to be dead

To be aware is to be alive yet dead

Where’s the promise of old

The new to become

In Golgotha which is to say skull 

There they crucified us

There they left us to rot in the morning sun

Save us Lord, save us

For our delusion is more than we can bare

We’ve become the sons of sorrow

And our prophesy has become endless

Save us Lord, save us

For our rock is unknown in this earth


A penny for my thoughts? What’s a million thoughts per second worth?

I sit here every night pondering and wondering why life and humanity is the way it is. Better yet, why I see life the way I do and no one else (at least no one that I know) sees it that way? Each day I feel like writing my thoughts down, but I always end up avoiding the pain in these emotions, by playing candy crush soda. It’s usually a lot easier, at least for a while.
All the same, here I am. Unable to avoid my pen any longer. Finally writing my emotions at 3.30am in the morning, thanks to the delusive tool that is Facebook.
 It’s funny how certain things come across as useful, yet they have a way of doling out society’s ugly and disgusting traits, or life’s ugliness, pain, and emptiness. For example, I log onto Facebook 2 days ago and find out someone I grew up with as a kid has passed away. I cry my eyes out and can’t bring myself to write a simple RIP on her Facebook wall. All I want to say is; I’m sorry I never stayed in touch. I’m sorry I never took a moment in time to ask you how life’s treating you, or ask you if you’re doing ok! I’m sorry is all I can think of. Yet I’m sorry isn’t really enough. 
Yesterday I logged onto Facebook again (24hrs after my mental breakdown from realizing an old friend is dead) and I see a picture of the most adorable baby trending on Facebook. With lots of comments from my friends, I decide to check out who this adorable baby belongs to. Turns out an old friend who deleted me off Facebook and cut me out of his life just had this beautiful baby. I’m thrilled for him. However, I can’t help but wonder if this baby will grow up being brainwashed and biased like its dad. See, the only reason my good old friend cut me off is because I posted the phrase “Happy Rosh Hashanah” on Facebook. We had a heated argument about the State of Israel. I was pro Israel, and he was pro Palestine. He hated Israel, and I loved both Israel and Palestine. For him, he couldn’t bring himself to be associated with someone he termed “A Jew Lover”. Even though we once lived in the same building, shared a couple of drinks after work, and shared lots of laughs and fun memories, he was done with me the second he learned I was in anyway remotely pro-Jews…. I still stare at our pictures and wonder how anyone could hate Israel that much???? I’ve never really understood the concept of prejudice.  Needless to say, mental breakdown part 2 set in. I quickly logged off and went back to bed. 
I logged on to Facebook again this morning (Addictive habit, this Facebook thing). I saw posts by someone I’d been trying to reach for weeks. I scroll through her page and see she’s doing fine. Actually she’s doing better than fine. She’s passionate about a group that I think is a ‘little cultish group’ (luckily I’ve kept my opinion about this group to myself). Turns out she really doesn’t give a flippity flop about me, and I’m just a bleep in her radar. One of many bleeps, and nothing more than a numbers filler. I see how everyone purrs at her and give her loads of attention. I see how everyone I’m connected to through her is no different from her. I look away because obviously envy is a sin. I’ll do myself some good by not becoming envious. 
However, she’s got me thinking. What purpose do we serve or achieve by staying connected to unnecessary people? Why do we spend time kissing the asses of mean conceited people and the ones with true love in their hearts waste away right before our eyes? The time I spent texting her, would have been time I spent saying hello to my now dead friend. I can’t help but compare my humble and meek dead friend to this conceited and overly inflated ego’ed acquaintance (see how my perception of her has shifted from friend to acquaintance). 
I’m exhausted from having to ponder society’s many disgusting traits. It’s easy for many to avoid it. It’s hard for me  to disconnect myself from it all. Whenever I write, it’s always in pain. I’ve been told I write way too many dark poems. Maybe it’s because we live in a dark world and we only choose to see and believe what we want to…
I’m exhausted. I should get some sleep. 

I haven’t written any poems in a while, cos I’ve been too busy being a working mum. 😦

I wrote this one for the little old lady down the road. For NancyLee

************************

A smile in time
That’s what she gave
The little lady that’s more of an angel than a little lady
She’s everyone’s favorite
Even mine
For like magic she captured me with her smile and almost quirky sense of humor

First impression wasn’t much to go by
But second impressions! Well that’s her specialty
She’ll wow your heart when you do meet her twice
Twice I say, cos no one really gets away with the best first impressions

Even then, a smile in time is what she gave me
It had been a lonesome week
Burdened with nothing but disappointments & uncertain anxieties
With a smile, she took most of it away

We never know what we could give
With a smile in time
Perhaps, just enough to save a life!

~ GE


It’s easy for the world to break you
It’s easy to get swept away
It’s easy to become invisible
Sometimes, it’s easy to stop believing

Where did you go wrong when you had it all right
The right opportunities
The right timing
The right energy

But soon enough you realize
The right everything isn’t enough
Something is still missing
Is it the attitude?
Is it some ethereal force
Is it the right person/people
What’s missing?

Every choice leads you a step closer to tomorrow
Perhaps tomorrow is your destiny
Then again tomorrow isn’t guaranteed
Still you push forward
Wishing you could fast forward

Everyday is another roller coaster
Waiting for that big break
Hoping to stop being invisible
Hoping those who don’t think much of you finally see what you see
Hoping you haven’t spent a lifetime deceiving yourself

Yet, to deceive oneself for a lifetime isn’t all too bad
To live in fantasy land hoping for that big break isn’t all too bad either
Cos you might just make it to that silly fun land if you run fast enough
And if there’s enough time to complete this race.

I pray you make it
I pray those who looked down on you get to say they were wrong
I hope you make it
I hope your tears dry up
And I hope you find happiness in this miserable world
I hope you shine brighter than any star
And your history be that of a happy ending
I hope your tale be the story of God
I hope you make it in time
I hope you find happily ever after
I hope your wishes come through
I hope you find that big break


Oh If I could tell you what love is
Love is the smell of rain on a hot summer day
It’s the smell of Christmas in Paris
It’s that unexplained emotion that keeps you smiling when you smell something reminiscent of your fondest memory

Love is you seeing into my soul and loving me in-spite of my dark side
Love is you believing in me when I didn’t know there was something worth believing in
Love is you holding on tight to me even when I try to break free

Love’s not always that perfect fairy tale
But it’s certainly that rocky start that turns good then perfect
Love’s that mate my soul never knew it needed
Love is coming home to your warm embrace when the world’s worn me out with a bad day
Love is that dose of harsh reality you give me every time we fight
And that reassuring bond we form over again whenever we make up

Love never leaves me ashamed
Love doesn’t make me feel less of myself
Love doesn’t leave me with regrets
Love doesn’t leave me feeling filthy
Love doesn’t lie
Love isn’t something stolen
Love is that slow burning amber that starts with a little spark and glows brighter than a burning bush for all of eternity

Love is me and you
Always and forever
Through pain and joy
Through struggles and triumphs
Through mistakes and infallibilities
Through this world and the next

~~ GE


Maybe it’s luck
Maybe it’s blessings
Maybe it’s predestination
Maybe it’s hard work and tears
We’ll probably never know
What we do know is the beauty in that moment

Maybe it’s you
Maybe it’s me
Maybe it’s GOD
Maybe it’s our hearts
And the strength in our character
We’ll probably never know
What we do know is the beauty in that moment

That precious moment when our dreams come true
That precious pivotal moment which swings us towards our destiny
That precious moment when you say hello to what you’ve known all your life

Some of us get there a little quicker than others
Some are always close.
Every now and again, some barely make it.
And what we’ll be is never truly known
What we do know, is the beauty in that precious moment

~ GE


I haven’t written in over 2 months. I haven’t even been inspired to come up with a single poetic syllable. It feels like I lost my mojo or my muse left me high and dry. But then again, I do think of writing every day. My heart, my head and my fingers twitch every second.

I keep telling myself, maybe I’ve finally experienced what they call ‘the writers block’. At least I’d like to think that’s the problem. But something tells me its more than that. I’ve been known to over think things and over-analyze every situation. I guess this is one of those situations huh? Maybe it is, maybe it’s not, who knows..

All I can say is, I lost my Mojo and it’ll be good to find it in someone’s ‘lost and found box’ somewhere somehow. I started this blog to get my poetry out there, and it’s been a beautiful experience, but then two books later and I’m wanting more. Not just poetry but J. K Rowlings’ kind of deal.

I started working on a sci-fi book last year but somehow my storyline keeps taking different forms. I find myself constantly comparing the plots to something I’ve seen in any sci-fi fantasy movie I watch lately, and In a bid to be overly creative and different, I end up wearing myself out.

However, for the last 2 months, it’s been completely silent in my head. No new ideas for a scene or plot. Not even a poetry line comes to mind. Then today I heard someone use the phase “Fake it till you make it” and it got me thinking. Can you fake your way through creativity. Can you have poetry without the passion and emotion? or can you create that masterpiece of a storyline without your creative juices flowing or while your ‘Mojo’ is still missing. Perhaps it takes discipline.

I mean I’ve had to fake an orgasm multiple times just to get it over with, but I never thought it was possible to fake creativity just to keep going???? Is it really possible?

Not saying anyone really does fake creativity and I know what you’re probably gonna say next is; “It’ll come back to you when it does”.. but what if it doesn’t? Is this what happens to dead dreams? You hear about people never getting to make their dreams a reality and you cant help but wonder what happened. Or you hear about one hit wonders and you wonder how they ended up in the archives of time and forgotten memories.

I know I’m over thinking the simplest of things again, but I cant help but think. I really do believe I may have been a Greek philosopher in my past life.

That being said. Thanks for visiting my blog. Be sure to buy my book here —> (Poetry My Love) and follow me on Twitter @GloriaE

I’ll try to write a little more often. Hopefully my Mojo will find its way home again 🙂


Chuck Prince once said “We have to dance till the music stops”… If you didn’t know, Chuck Prince used to be my boss’s boss. I loved him, looked up to him as a genius, and everyday i’m still reminded of the meaning behind this phrase. But as years pass by, i’ve come to realize, just as we must dance while the music plays, we must also learn to know when the music has stopped. Because eventually the music will stop, time will pass and all you’re left with is the memory of those beats and the adrenaline rush while you danced.

Was it a good dance or not? only time tells. Still, in your heart, you will know if your feet and passion carried you on the winds of time towards your destiny.

Eventually the music will stop. When it does, you must learn to walk again and carry-on like you never danced. Things will be tough once again, but remembering that you once danced gives you the fire you need to create a new opportunity to dance again.

Ask yourself these questions. Are you still dancing when the music has stopped? Do you even know how to tell time? Do you know how to listen up for the beat? do you know when its your queue to dance? better yet, do you think i’m still talking about music and dance 🙂

Subliminal and abstract messaging is my thing, What’s yours? 🙂


Today, i’ve come to realize we’re sort of all the same in the way we think and process our experiences. From the little memories we think we’ve forgotten, to the faults we find in others and subconsciously respond to, or NOT respond to in our own quirky way. Somehow, we’re all counting our neighbor’s faults and paying little attention to ours.

I learnt of something called “Record Collection” this week. I had taken a job related assessment and this “Record Collection” index was part of the evaluation. The aim of the assessment was to have a low score in the “Record collection” index, along with some other risk pointing flags like; Need for approval, Control of emotions (aka emotional maturity) and Money weakness. I ended up with a relatively high score (which by the way was a huge Red Flag) in my Record Collection index.

Now you would think this is a good thing right? like the more you’re able to remember every tiny detail or experience, the better you would be at making apt decisions, right? But not according to this assessment, and not for the purpose of the assessment. Certain choices and/or positions require the ability to be “Selectively and whole heartedly forgetful”.

Not to bug you down with unnecessary jargon, i’ll cut down to the chase and explain what this index means and what scoring a high figure meant for me. Dr. Roger Birkman was the first to postulate that for each of us, our choices, reactions, likes, dislikes and everyday behavior is pretty much set in stone, except we experience a life changing ordeal like, losing a loved one, coming close to death etc.. Thus, we can pretty much expect the same response from the same person when put in a specific situation.

The “Record collection index” relates to how our minds gather and store information as we experience different events. For example, when someone tells us No over and over again, our minds will subconsciously store those rejections till we get to a point where we resent that person, or resent our experience of having to ask for something. My scoring a high figure in this index pointed to the fact that i will always remember every experience of being told “NO”, and eventually i would resent being in a position of “having to ask” or being in a position of “expectation”.

This assessment got me thinking of how over the years i’ve lost a couple of friends, and how i never really thought much of my choices and/or attitude influencing other people’s choices. For example, a couple of years ago, i had a friend i really liked. We met in new york and we hit it off like birds of a feather. We loved doing the same things and pretty much did almost everything together. But there was something she didn’t like about me. I’m a really picky person. I’m picky with food, friends, everything. I didn’t realize how much this part of me affected her till it was too late. She would choose a restaurant, and because of my picky nature, i would end up eating little to nothing. I thought the food tasted terrible. She, on the other hand, thought the food was good and i was being rude and condescending. Eventually, she cut me out of her life and never responded to any of my attempts to be in contact with her.

I remember her today because i found out she’s in switzerland doing great things, and even though I’m doing great by myself, i sometimes wonder what we could have created if we teamed up as friends.

The experience from this assessment also made me aware of my choices to forget certain friends. I realized i don’t do very well with rejection. I like to think i take things with a grain of salt, but the truth is, unlike everybody else i REMEMBER every single NO you tell me. I’m generally a very forgetful person. I forget my wedding anniversary, what i had for breakfast, even my daughter’s birthday :(. But sadly for some strange reason I’ll never forget every NO you tell me. 1 too many ‘NOs’ turns you from a close friend to a “Fiend”. Unfortunately, i don’t know how to fix this part of me, but i guess there’s still room to grow.

Hopefully time will tell if this is truly a weakness or a strength. or if there’s any salvation for this thing called ‘Human Relations’.

Or maybe like they say “What is meant to be will be”

If you know how to be selectively and whole heartedly forgetful please do share 🙂



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